_________________________________

Erin: greetings
Kira: hullo
Erin: How was your day yesterday? You didn't terribly lost, did you?
Kira: nope! worked out fine thanks again!
Erin: You're welcome
Erin: grrrraaaa!!
Erin: I'm going to unplug my phone
Kira: why?
Erin: it keeps ringing and I don't want to answer it
Kira: ah maybe its trevor
Erin: ha, no.
Erin: people keep calling for my mom.
Erin: I WISH it were Trevor
Kira: ah. there is something i should tell you but truthfuly i'm scared of how you would react
Erin: ah.. what is it?
Kira: hmm...one sec
Erin: ....ok
Erin: build the anticipation...
Kira: sry
Kira: just had to take the lock off the diary. go to archives and look at First Entry
Erin: Oh....
Kira: you finished reading it?
Erin: yeah
Kira: i feel like such crap for not telling you before but at the same time i didn't want to ruin your vacation and I had hoped that Trevor would have been smart enought to talk to you has he?
Erin: about that? No
Erin: but it doesn't matter
Kira: ?
Erin: when he comes home, he'll be greeted with a slap in the face (maybe literally)
Kira: this is driving me mad a penny for all your thoughts
Erin: My thoughts: He doesn't want to be with me, fine.
Erin: Then he doesn't have to be.
Kira: you need to talk to him about it though 'cause Cory told me that he keeps changing his mind which means he migth still care about you.
Erin: meh, too bad.
Kira: i feel like i've just killed the relationship this is crap
Kira: but i'm pissed at him for not talking to you
Erin: Kira, we didn't have a relationship TO kill.
Kira: can't say i have anything to say to that
Erin: I'm bossy and controlling?
Kira: but that was why i kept that diary locked and didn't really tell you about it. i for one dont think so at all! i dont get where he gets that from
Erin: Hmm... maybe cause I call him on his lack of boyfriend-ness
Kira: i wouldn't be surprized. he's a lazy work-o-holic dont know how to type that but i'm sure you know what i mean
Erin: yeah
Kira: lazy with girls and covers it up with work
Erin: yeah
Erin: but hey, I guess I was waiting for the "last straw"... there it is
Kira: you were?
Erin: In a way, I guess.. because I couldn't get through to him AT ALL... but I wasn't sure ending it was the right thing... now, what other choice do I have?
Kira: talking to him to force the truth out of him
Kira: he either loves you like he said or he doesn't and he's been i dont know playing you?
Kira: he has to get that through his head no more of this back and forth.
Erin: I don't think there's anything left to talk about.
Erin: I was going to talk about everything with him when he got home...
Erin: Now I don't feel like there's anything to talk about.
Kira: you need to talk to him though
Kira: as much as you dont want to
Erin: why? we've both seen the fruits of any time I try to talk to him.
Erin: I think I might throw up, though.
Kira: good point the most you might get out of him is a blank stare as he tries to figure out what to say
Kira: i'm sorry maybe i shouldn't have said anything
Erin: No, I'm glad you did.
Erin: I even wish I knew sooner.
Kira: i still feel like crap though
Kira: for that reason
Erin: Don't.
Kira: heh well at least he'll get what he deserves when he gets back
Erin: It's not your fault that my so-called boyfriend doesn't even want to be with me.
Erin: In a spiteful way, I wish I could call him now and tell him.
Kira: hey Cory says hes been back and forth about it
Erin: Maybe it'd ruin his vacation.
Kira: you should!
Kira: but i'm evil so you shouldn't really listen to me on this sort of thing
Erin: Hey, I'm evil too.
Kira: yay evil ppl!
Erin: And who knows to what evil lengths I can go to when I'm hurt...
Kira: oh you'll at least let me in on the plans right?
Erin:Yeah.
Erin: I have to keep myself from throwing up...
Kira: lay down, have a good cry and drink some sprite. or watch tv or read
Kira: *shrugs* go do whatever to make yourself feel better
Erin: I don't have time to cry.
Kira: ah gotta go somewhere?
Erin: Have to babysit
Kira: oh great fun i'm sorry
Erin: which... won't be easy
Erin: Why sorry?
Erin: Besides, why should I cry over him?
Kira:cause i put you in this mood before having to go do that
Erin:That's ok.. you made it easier for me to not eat today.
Kira: damn Erin you better at least eat something!
Kira: and drink sprite so you dont barf!
Erin: No I know.
Erin: But my heart feels like it sunk...
Erin: and I'm mad at myself.
Kira: for letting yourself fall for a guy like him? *wants to punch him right now*
Erin: that too
Erin: and for giving him SO many chances
Erin: and for being stupid over him
Kira: i was actually wondering if you would stop giving him chances before he talked to you but i was wrong
Kira: you tired to give him more than he deserved and he fucked that up bad
Erin: yeah, he really did
Erin: Can I ask you an honest question?
Kira: yeah
Kira: anything
Erin: Do you think maybe he was lying about his family not liking me, to... maybe find an excuse to break up?
Erin: Cause I think that's the ONLY thing he hasn't lied to me about...
Kira: now that you mention it yes. everyone that i've talked to say that he's been lying a lot more
Kira: i never got the vibe that his family hated you. i think they liked you
Kira: you know i kept telling you that
Erin: I got a vibe that they didn't want me around, though.
Kira: well his mom seemed to like you
Erin: Or maybe they knew what he was up to, and wanted to make it easier for one of us…
Kira: that makes sence
Erin: *sigh*
Kira: didn't his mom say that he was a bad boyfriend?
Erin: No.. but she used to ask me "has trevor called you today/yesterday/recently?"
Kira: yeah
Erin: Thank you, Kira.
Kira: Your welcome i guess but dont go doing anything like (edited out)
Erin: The irony is, Usher's "Let it burn" came on the radio when I first IMed you...
Kira: hmm i cant think of the words
Erin: I'll try, but I can't make any promises.
Erin: Oh, it's a song that's message is basically "It's over, move on"
Kira: please Erin you're my friend and i care about you!
Kira: dont do that stuff
Erin: It's not something I can actually controll... It's in my system to hurt myself.
Kira: *has nothing to say*
Kira: hey hang out with some of your friends and do stuff to take your mind off him ok? surround yourself with friends and family and all that and have fun. make the best of this. it'll be a lot more stess without him around
Kira: *a lot LESS stress
Kira: damn that was messed...i cant type
Kira: btw i might have to leave any second but you are welcomed to call me if you want to talk at all
Erin: Thanks.
Kira: so if i dissapear the phone'll be open
Erin: and as to the above.... I don't have friends to hang out with. except you
Erin: and I don't like to be around people if I'm not myself.
Kira: they all down in cali?
Erin: hmm..pretty much…one in aberdeen *who I need to send flowers or something to*
Kira: lol
Erin: she joined the army, she ships out sep 8th
Kira: oh
Erin: But don't worry about me.. I'll be ok.
Kira: *kicks Bush* damn him!
Erin: ?
Kira: *shrugs* two ppl i talk to online are also getting shipped out.
Kira: all because of this stupid war
Erin: yeah war is crap
Kira: it is!
Erin: BTW, can I print that diary entry...? as..."proof"?
Kira: yeah sureKira: and any others if you need to that diary is open to you now.
Erin: is there more about him? I only read that one entry.
Kira: ah i dont think so
Kira: the july 22nd entry
Erin: Ok, I have to go.
Erin: Love ya.
Erin: I'll maybe call you later.
Kira: i hope you start feeling better soon i love you too and yes do! we have to hang out before i go to camp for a week
Erin: haha, camp
Kira: lol i know! i'll need your address so i can write to you!

___________________________________

Ain't that GRAND?

Backward - Forward